More Than Just Coping: Empowerment Strategies for Parents

Jeremy Sicile-Kira - then

Jeremy Sicile-Kira – then

Yesterday I presented at IEP Day (Involved Exceptional Parents’ Day Conference) in San Diego. I  promised to post some information here for participants, so they could easily access some links to free information. Feel free to pass this to other parents who need the information.

As a parent of a newly diagnosed child with special needs, it is not always easy. As we discussed yesterday, you may be feeling very emotional and upset, and that is normal. Remember, you are not alone. Many parents have been there before, and joining support groups with parents can be very helpful. You can share information.

Remember, you may be eligible for services and sometimes things go smoothly, sometimes they do not, and every school district is different. You will have to learn to be an advocate for your child. Knowing your rights is important. You will get services based on facts, not emotions.

In each state, there is information available for free to help you know your rights and responsibilities as a parent of a child with a disability, or a person with a disability. In some states it is called Protection and Advocacy; in California it is Disability Rights California   http://www.disabilityrightsca.org.

There is a lot of information on that website, and great publications you can read on different rights and responsibilities you have. For example, If you want information as a parent of a child who receives special education services, click on “Publications and Resources” at the top http://www.disabilityrightsca.org/pubs/PublicationsIndex.htm.   You can see the list of publications that explain in simple language what the laws mean. If English is not your native language, you can click on the language you want to read the document in (Spanish, Korean, etc). You want to read “The Special Education Rights and Responsibilities (SERR) in regards to special education.

Here is a series of blogposts I wrote specifically for parents of newly diagnosed children. This information is from my newly revised book, Autism Spectrum Disorder (2014). Although the book is specifically geared towards autism, the advice in the blogposts below is true for any new parent of a special needs child, especially # 1 and # 4.

1.  Advice for Parents of Newly Diagnosed Children with Autism http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-autism-advocate/201402/advice-parents-newly-diagnosed-children-autism

2.  New to Autism? Where to Go for Information http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-autism-advocate/201402/new-autism-where-go-information

3.  Newly Diagnosed Child With Autism? First Steps for Parents http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-autism-advocate/201402/newly-diagnosed-child-autism-first-steps-parents

4.   Parents New to Autism: More First Steps to Take http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-autism-advocate/201402/parents-new-autism-more-first-steps-take

You may also wish to sign up to receive free occasional newsletters from my website  AutismCollege.com – scroll down the home page.

If you want to see my son Jeremy’s commencement speech to hear his words, you will find it here: Autism: Transition to Adulthood: Jeremy Sicile-Kira’s High School Commencement Speech.

Even if your child cannot speak, it does not mean he or she does not understand. Speak in whatever language you are comfortable in. Research shows that hearing two languages does not impede understanding. Just be consistent in using the same language.

Remember: your child is different – but not less! Tell your child everyday that you love him or her. Read to your child, sing to your child. You are connecting with your child, and that is the most important ‘therapy’ in the world. Over time you will see that you are learning as much from him or her as your child is learning from you. never give up on your child!

Jeremy Sicile-Kira - now

Jeremy Sicile-Kira – now

Back to School Tips for Educators and Parents: Free Autism College Q&A with Chantal Sicile-Kira and Dana Pulde

It’s almost the end of  summer and  most parents  are  looking forward to the routine the new school year will provide, and teachers are busy getting classrooms and lessons ready for the new school year.  The start of a new school year can also mean more stress  for all involved – the student, the educator and the parent.  But there are ways to keep stress to a minimum  for a new and hopefully successful new school year.

Autism College hopes to help this year by offering you a one hour free Q & A with Visiting Professor, Dana Pulde, a Special Education Teacher,  moderated by Chantal Sicile-Kira. Both Dana and Chantal are looking forward to answering your questions and giving  tips to educators on how  to prepare the classroom, and to parents on how to prepare yourself and your child for the start of a successful new school year! Whether your child is fully included or in a special day class there are ways to prepare and alleviate some of the stress of the transition from summer to school, especially when there are teachers new to your child or teenager.

Join  Chantal and Dana  for the free interactive Q & A on Thursday, August 16 from 6:00pm to 7:00pm PST (9:00pm to 10:00 EST).

To submit  your questions, go here.

Here is the information for the day of the event:
To attend online, go to:
http://InstantTeleseminar.com/?eventid=32195109
To call in:
Primary dial in number: (206) 402-0100
Secondary dial in number: (208) 272-9671
Guest pin code: 026332#

Dana Pulde Dana Pulde has been working in the field of special education for a little over a decade.  She began as a paraprofessional working in homes with families using Applied Behavior Analysis to help students with autism.  She resumed her studies to continue her professional growth receiving a moderate/severe teaching credential and masters in autism and she has completed her supervision hours to become a Board Certified Behavior Analyst.  She began her teaching career working at a non-public school serving students with IEPs where she was responsible for developing student programs, creating and implementing Behavior Intervention Plans, Collecting and analyzing data, and creating/modifying materials to meet student needs and support academic growth.  She has continued her career as a supervisor for families of children with special needs by developing home programs and providing ongoing staff and parent training; as a teacher in a public school; and is currently working with an advocate making sure students receive a quality life and education through optimum support and offers of FAPE.

Chantal Sicile-Kira is the founder of AutismCollege.com and the author  of five books on autism, the latest being A Full Life with Autism: From Learning to Forming Relationships to Achieving Independence (co-authored with her son, Jeremy). Chantal’s first practical experience with autism was at Fairview State Hospital, teaching self-help and community living skills to severely developmentally disabled and autistic adolescents in preparation for their de-institutionalization.  Chantal has served on  the California Senate Select Committee on Autism & Related Disorders, and was appointed to serve as  Co-Chair, South Counties Autism Regional Taskforce.  Her son, Jeremy,  graduated from high school at age 22 with a 3.78 GPA despite being severely impacted by autism.

Free Q & A on Back to School Tips with Dr. Peter Faustino, moderated by Chantal Sicile-Kira

By the end of the summer, most of us parents are happy to see summer end knowing our ASD children will have routine and a schedule back in their lives (and so will we).  But  we dread the stress related to the start of a new school year.  There are ways to lessen the stress and help prepare both your child and the teacher for a new and hopefully successful new school year.

Autism College hopes to help this year by offering you a two hour free Q & A with Visiting Professor, Dr. Peter Faustino, school psychologist, moderated by Chantal Sicile-Kira. Both Dr. Faustino and Chantal have written on the topic and are looking forward to answering your questions and giving you tips to prepare your child, yourself, and the teacher for the start of a successful new school year! Whether your child is fully included or in a special day class there are ways to prepare and alleviate some of the stress of the transition from summer to school, especially when there are teachers new to your child or teenager.

Join Dr. Faustino and Chantal on Monday, August 22, 2011 from 6:00 to 8:00pm PST on the topic : Tips for Reducing the  Back to School Stress for Children with Autism, Parents and Educators.

Dr. Peter Faustino has been working as a school psychologist for more than 12 years.  He is currently the President of the New York Association of School Psychologists (NYASP).  NYASP – the state affiliate of NASP (www.naspweb.org) – serves children, their families, and the school community by promoting psychological well-being, excellence in education, and sensitivity to diversity through best practices in school psychology.  Dr. Faustino joined the Bedford Central School District in 2003 to work at the Fox Lane Middle School. Dr. Faustino also maintains a private practice with the Developmental Assessment and Intervention Center (DAIC) in Bedford Hills, NY.  He presents frequently at national conferences, schools, and parent organizations.

To sign up for the webinar, please signup for our newsletter here. Already signed up for the newsletter? Click here.

Back to School 101: Tips for General Education Teachers About Students with Asperger’s Syndrome

This was first published as a  blog post on my  Psychology Today blog on September 9, 2010, but the information is still still relevant today.

Often junior high and high school teachers have teenagers with Asperger’s Syndrome (AS) included in their classrooms, and are not given much in the way of useful information. Here I hope to provide a few practical tips that may be helpful to educators with no practical knowledge about students on the spectrum.

Parents, you may wish to print this out to give to your child’s teacher, or send them the link. There are only a few tips here, but usually teachers are receptive so practical information that may help them to understand and reach their student.

Asperger’s or High Functioning Autism (HFA) is often described as an ‘invisible disability’ because students on the spectrum do not look different frorm most students. Most teachers expect them to act like everyone else, but often the student gets in trouble for behaving in a way that seems rude, disruptive or non-compliant. A diagnosis of Asperger’s or HFA is based on challenges in the areas of communication, and social relationships, as well as what appears to be an obsession or passion for a particular area of interest.

Here are some tips that may help the school year go a little easier for you and your student on the spectrum:

* It’s a good idea to have a hard copy of the homework assignment to hand to your students on the spectrum, because most of them are mono-channel, meaning they have only one other processing channels (auditory or visual) working effectively at one time. This means they cannot look at the assignment on the board, write it down and still be able to focus on what you are saying. By the time they have finished copying down the assignment, they have missed your intro to that day’s lesson. This mono-channel aspect makes it hard for a student to multi-task, and by only requiring him/her to do one thing at a time, it will be much easier for the student to be focused on the day’s lesson.

* The student with Asperger’s or HFA usually takes things literally – this is part of the communication challenge. For example, if you address the class by saying “Please turn to page 12,” expecting the students to start doing the work on that page, the Aspie student may turn to page 12, and then just sit there, awaiting further instruction. Meanwhile, you may think he is being a smart-aleck, but I assure you, he is not. You need to say “Please turn to page 12 and write the answers to question 1-5 in your notebook.”

* This taking things literally means that also the student may not understand all the nuances of language or social customs, what we call ‘hidden curriculum.’ Think of what it is like as a foreigner in a new land and how they need to be explained the local customs- that is what it is like for a person on the spectrum.

* Students on the spectrum are often described as being obsessed with a particular topic or subject, for example, space travel, buildings, certain types of music, transportation. Actually, being passionate about a topic shows an interest in learning. If you know what your student is passionate about, you can relate your lessons or subject in some way to his area of interest and your student will excel.

* Many students on the spectrum are overly sensitive to noise and crowds, making transition times between classrooms difficult. By allowing the student to arrive or leave a few minutes early or late, you will make it much easier for that student to arrive to class less stressed, and ready to focus on the lesson.

Students with Asperger’s Syndrome or HFA are usually very bright and eager to learn. Hopefully these tips will help the year be a more productive one for you and your student.

Making sure your child with autism gets a good education at school

A good education is important to helping a child to develop and learn. In the United States we are very fortunate to have The Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA). If your child has an autism spectrum disorder and needs special education, you will need to become familiar with the rights your child has under (IDEA).

Since 1975, IDEA  requires  that  all individuals  have access to a ‘free and appropriate education (FAPE).’ IDEA is a federal act, and  each state may not take away the special education rights provided under IDEA, but may provide more.

Basically, every child  under the age of three and at risk of developing a substantial disability if early interventions are not provided is eligible for early intervention. The names of the different programs my vary by state, but  you can check with  your state’s Department of Health, Department of Developmental Disability, or Department of Education about early intervention. If you need help finding help or information in your area, look at the website of the Federal Interagency Coordinating Council (www.fed-icc.org).

In the educational system, if a student is eligible, an Individualized Education Program (IEP) is developed that  sets out the ways the child will be helped with his areas of difficulties, and  goals and objectives are developed. The IEP is developed by an IEP team at IEP’s that take place at least annually.

An IEP team consists of the parents, the child’s teacher, a general education teacher, a special education administrator, any professionals providing services such as occupational therapy,  speech and language therapy, and adapted physical education.

Sometimes, some members of the IEP team and / or the parents may not be in agreement as to how a child’s educational needs should be  met, and what constitutes a ‘free and appropriate education’ for your child. As a parent, it is important to get to know how your child learns. Remember that you are the expert on your child. Also, it is important to keep abreast of the educational methods that are out there that may help your child.

If you are in disagreement with the rest of the IEP team, there are appropriate ways for you to express your disagreement. The first step is to try and have good and open communication with your child’s teacher and other professionals involved in helping your child with his difficulties. The second is to make sure you know your child’s rights under IDEA. As a parent you will need to become an advocate for your child.

As laws and regulations change, parents and educators can  stay informed   by  checking the US Department  of Education (www.ed.gov) and your state department of education.

Most, if not all, states have an agency that helps people with disabilities and tells you your rights in plain language, and provides information in different languages.  To find out how your state interprets IDEA, These are usually called Protection and Advocacy offices. Often these agencies have decoded the complicated IDEA and made it available on-line in easy to understand layman terms so that parents can understand the rights their children have in terms of education.

In my next post, I’ll cover some autism parenting tips to ensure your child is getting the education he or she needs. You can also read more in my book, Autism Spectrum Disorders. Tips on how to communicate and negotiate more effectively with your school will be given in the course  Empowerment Strategies for the ASD Parent on Thursdays May 5,12,19,26, from 6:00 – 8:00 PM PST.